Child As Parent

Yesterday my daughter ended her post by sharing with us that her children teach her daily.  I can so relate!  As a young mom, I learned many things from the honest expressions of my kids.  

And while my children are no longer curious toddlers or independent-seeking youth living under my roof, they teach me still.

The afternoon of Halloween, He-man and I went to JD's and Pleasure's so that I could take pictures of the little pumpkins in their costumes.  As we arrived we noticed that Sunshine and Dreamer were just getting home from school.  JD was walking slightly behind them carrying Tornado.  Sunshine's eyes were focused on the ground as she walked past us without a word.

I asked JD what was wrong and he said that she was upset, but that he was sure all would be fine.  They just needed to talk.   

Sunshine's bike had been missing for a couple of days and no one quite knew what had happened.  They weren't sure if she had left her bike outside all night... if she had left it at a friend's house or school or what exactly.  

On her way home from school that afternoon Sunshine saw her bike rolling down the street powered under some other girl's steam.  Sunshine approached her and laid claim to her bike.  The surprised little girl declared that it WAS NOT Sunshine's bike.  She thought that maybe they had purchased it at a garage sale around the corner.  But Sunshine was not buying her story.  She knew it WAS her bike.  JD interviened and told Sunshine to go on home where they would decide what to do.  Sunshine was not happy, but obeyed JD, and turned for home with her feet shuffling the ground and head hanging low.

When Sunshine, Dreamer, He-man and I went inside and the door shut behind us Sunshine began telling her mom about discovering her missing bike.  

She was obviously upset and a bit confused with the response of the girl riding her bike.  She KNEW it was her bike.  How could the other girl deny it?

JD said, "It's okay Sunshine.  We can get you another bike.  This little girl doesn''t have one.  She watches you and Dreamer ride by her house every day on your way to school and I wonder if she looks at you and thinks, "I wish I had a bike like that lucky girl and boy."

Sunshine still wasn't sure JD was getting the picture.... Someone stole her bike!!! That couldn't be right.

 

JD encouraged Sunshine to think about the "what-if factor."  What if you wanted a bike like all the other kids in your neighborhood?  What if your mom and dad didn't have money to buy you a bike?  What if you really, really wanted a bike... but there was no way you could have one?  What if you were like that little girl?

The whole room was silent as if it were all of us who had lost a bike we were fortunate to have in the first place.  The silence ended abuptly with Dreamer's excited entrance and announcement that Sunshine's bike was parked on the front lawn.  Sunshine sprang to her feet like a deer and bounded out the front door.  Sure enough, her bike had been returned.  Short of a broken pedal and a flat tire, all else was in good shape.  

You would think that the story ended there, but that is where it only got better.  JD didn't say, "Okay, your bike is back.  Everything is okay."  He said, "Okay your bike has been returned.  Now can you think of a way we could get that little girl a bike of her own?"  

Dreamer was on it in a flash.  He grabbed some paper and a pen and said, "Do you want me to go and get the names of all the kids in her family?  There are a lot of them.  I bet they all need bikes."

JD's response was immediate and certain.  "Sure, Dreamer.  You go and get their names.  I bet between all of us here, we can find a way to get bikes for those kids."

From that moment on the energy changed.  The disappointment and disgust over a stolen biked turned into an excited challenge of finding a way to provide joy for another. 

I learned a lot from my son that day.  I learned that everything I have is a gift of fortune, whether I worked for it or not.  I learned that my body actually felt better when thinking of how we could give a little person a bike than when I was thinking of the injustice of a little girl stealing a bike.  I learned that an amazing heart inhabits my son's soul  and what fortune his step children possess in being parented by him.

13. I am grateful for being parented by my child.

If you read this in morning, I hope your day is filled with fortune.  If you read this at night, I hope your sleep is filled with generous dreams.  I hope that you are recipient of good will and giver of the same to some one else.